“By becoming a black belt, you will become whatever it is you wanted to be in the first place.”
(Chris Matakas)
Happy Living is very excited about our latest book, Finding Your Black Belt, from first-time author and Fourth Degree Tae Kwon Do Master, Karen Conover.
In Finding Your Black Belt, Conover explores how the everyday person can use the principles of martial arts to create an inspirational life. By sharing her own experience of earning a black belt and supporting others on that journey, Conover demonstrates how these principles can be expanded into everyday life.
Conover has also included some of her students’ stories in the book, in their own words, allowing readers to clearly see how the principles studied along the way—such as self-discipline, perseverance and respect—can play a part in motivating people of all ages and backgrounds to achieving “black belt excellence.”
Below is an excerpt from Finding Your Black Belt: How to Kick Ass in Your Own World.
ATTAINING A MARTIAL ARTS BLACK BELT
Starting a martial arts journey doesn’t usually include any expectation of great things. Yes, there is always the promise that if one works hard, then the black belt will come. But I really didn’t think that applied to me. I was going to be Bruce Lee? Pshhht, I don’t think so. But this is fun and way cooler than the gym, so I’m gonna keep going! The usual beginnings in martial arts are completely awkward and unsure. You walk into a studio full of people who seem to know a ton more than you and then your limits of comfort are tested right from the first day: Can you stand on one foot for longer than ten seconds and snap out a kick, then remain on one foot for another ten seconds in control and without wobbling? Can you complete five pushups, then ten, then twenty, even though you’ve never done sports or fitness? Can you memorize a pattern of moves, which foot goes where and which hand is next to chop or punch? Can you handle someone grabbing you tight, as you listen and learn the escape? It can be overwhelming to be a beginner at anything, especially when coming to it as an adult, and martial arts are no exception.
The way your typical martial arts school works is like this: there is a progression of belts from white belt through various color belts that lead to a black belt. Each belt signifies a completion or mastery of certain techniques and requirements. In my school’s case, there was a balanced kick, a bunch of combinations or techniques, a form or kata, sparring drills and self-defense moves that had to be learned for each belt. There are ten belts prior to black. A typical timeline gets you there in four years after acute study, training, practice and tests.
I started martial arts as an adult at age twenty-eight, right after the birth of my first child. Call it a workout-get-back-into-shape plan where someone with a black belt cracks the whip. I was a soccer athlete and musician in high school and college, so pushups and memorization have never been a problem for me in martial arts. I wasn’t afraid to perform either. But confidence, that was what I didn’t have. I always questioned whether I was good enough and definitely didn’t have a belief in myself in this new arena.
My first great moment in martial arts was earning my gold belt (which is the next belt after white). It felt like I’d earned a black belt. Woohoo! I did something! The graduation to my gold belt happened to be the same day that others earned their black belts and the big Master came for the test. I remember feeling awkward and unsure. He even corrected me on my bow when I approached him to receive my belt. I will never forget what he talked about that day: a black belt is a white belt who never quit. Ah! It seemed so simple, how to get there. Just keep going. Perseverance. That moment, I think, was when I actually ‘found MY black belt.’ I found my confidence and the belief that I could attain it. From that point on, nothing could stop me. I ended up earning my first-degree black belt six months after the birth of my second child and in a timeline of three and a half years.
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